


Saying Goodbye

by birds_in_winter



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/F, Post-Canon, Star Trek Secret Santa 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-02
Updated: 2020-01-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:01:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22088320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/birds_in_winter/pseuds/birds_in_winter
Summary: An upset Nerys visits Ezri towards the end of her shift and they try to find a solution together.Made for trillscienceofficer for Star Trek Secret Santa 2019 who requested Ezri/Kira.I hope you like it!
Relationships: Ezri Dax/Kira Nerys, Kira Nerys & the O'Briens
Comments: 8
Kudos: 14
Collections: Star Trek Secret Santa 2019





	1. Chapter 1

Ezri glanced up at the clock. It was 16:00 hours, meaning that there was only one more hour before her shift was over. She glanced at her PADD now filled with messages from several clients notifying her that they would be moving off of Deep Space Nine now that the war had ended. Ezri didn’t blame them in the slightest, the Dominion War had taken so many lives, and of those who had managed to survive, many now viewed the station as a grim reminder of all that had happened. 

Some of her friends were included in that category. Odo, Worf, and the O’Briens were all leaving Deep Space Nine, all going in the path they thought best for them. It was sad, but she was hopeful that the relationships they all had forged with one another meant they would remain in contact. 

A chime came from her office door. She wasn’t expecting anyone since it was currently her office hours to fill out paperwork, but she decided to answer nonetheless.

“Come in,” Ezri called out. The door opened and familiar boots walked towards her, footstep rhythms confirming the identity before she looked up. Nerys stood before her, her brown eyes filled with sadness. Ezri’s heart ached at the sight. “Nerys, what happened?” Ezri stood and met Nerys in the middle of the room. Her blue eyes searched Nerys’ brown ones, hoping it would give her any insight as to what had happened.

“I…” Nerys’ voice began strong but it quickly faltered. Her bottom lip trembled slightly and in an effort to compose herself, she shut her eyes. Nerys let out a slow breath as if to relax, but her hands were clenched into fists. She had to fight to regain control of her emotions. To her relief, she had won. “You know what, this was a mistake. I’m sorry Ezri, I didn’t mean to bother you while you were on shift.” Nerys made to turn away but Ezri’s hands fell lightly onto Kira’s elbows, squeezing affectionately before sliding them down to Nerys’ hands. She found her own hands interlacing themselves with Ezri’s before she could even process what was going on.

“It’s my _job_ to help those who are hurting Nerys… not just as a counselor, but as someone who loves you, let me help.” Ezri smiled up at Nerys, hoping that her words would be enough to persuade her to confide in her. Nerys was strong and independent, no doubt a product of her upbringing, but even the strong need support, and Ezri so desperately wanted to be that for her. Nerys looked down at their interlocked hands for a moment and nodded. She let go of one of Ezri’s hands as they walked over to the sofa, settling down close enough that their knees nearly touched. 

“So I assume you came here to talk to me as your girlfriend and not for counseling right? Because if you’re here for counseling, Jirani is really great,” Ezri joked. Nerys smiled at that and Ezri mirrored her. Nerys couldn’t resist that small smile of hers. It was what made Ezri so special. She had all these little mannerisms, the crinkling of her nose, the small upturn of her lip, those expressive eyes of hers... Ezri didn’t guard her emotions like she did, and her openness is what drew her in and made her feel safe.

“Are you sure you aren’t busy?” Nerys insisted. Ezri shook her head.

“I’m not. All I’m doing are answering messages and filing right now, things that are much less important than finding out what’s making you so upset.” Ezri noted Nerys’ continued hesitance. “We can lock the doors and enact a privacy protocol so no one will interrupt. You can trust me Nerys.” After a moment, Nerys nodded. Ezri did as she said she would and made certain no one would interrupt them. “So tell me what’s going on.” Nerys let out a long exhale.

“Alright then… I’m upset because the O’Briens are having a going-away party.” Ezri blinked in confusion. 

“Can you explain that a bit?” Nerys sighed in response.

“Julian told me this morning that the O’Brien’s were leaving Deep Space Nine so Miles could take a teaching position at the Academy.” Ezri nodded.

“I heard about that, he and his family are relocating to Earth.”

“I don’t know Ezri, I guess I’m upset that of all people I heard it from, it was _Julian_ . Not Miles, or Keiko… Prophets, I _just_ found out that the going-away party is _this_ evening!”

“I talked to Keiko about it last week,” Ezri admitted. Keiko had told her they didn’t want to make a big deal of their leaving. “If I had known you didn’t know I would have told you sooner.” Nerys shook her head.

“That’s not the problem. The problem is that…” Nerys trailed off, gaze drifting up towards the direction of the wormhole. Nerys did that often as a silent plea for the prophets. Today she asked for their strength. “... I’m being overemotional.”

“Nerys we feel emotions for a reason, that isn’t the problem.”

“What _is_ the problem then?” Nerys asked frustratedly. “Clearly I’m misinterpreting something because I thought we were…” Nerys turned away from Ezri and looked towards the window looking out into space. A lone shuttle passed by the window, flying away at impulse power before eventually shifting into warp one and disappearing. Now that the shuttle was gone, all that was left to view was their two reflections sitting side by side, staring ahead. Nerys’ reflection swallowed nervously. 

“I thought we were like a family.” Ezri turned to the real Nerys, eyes wide. Nerys kept staring ahead at her reflection. She let go of Ezri’s hand and rubbed her palms together. The hand that had held Ezri’s was warm, while the other was cool to the touch. “The truth is, as much as I initially felt uncomfortable and upset at my pregnancy, Kirayoshi ended up being a blessing from the Prophets. When I acted as a surrogate mother for Kirayoshi, the O’Briens offered me a place to stay… and I don’t know Ezri… it felt like I was a part of a family. Those months I spent with them made me realize how much I didn’t have. My brothers died during the Cardassian Occupation, and I thought I’d lost any chance of becoming an aunt. Then all of a sudden Molly was calling me her Aunt Nerys and it felt so wonderful. I even had a child who for a while considered me their mother. I had gotten a family… something I hadn’t had since my father died during the final years of the occupation.”

“It must have felt wonderful to be a part of a family after so long.” Nerys felt vulnerable as she admitted her feelings aloud, but she forced herself to continue. 

“It was, but now that the O’Brien’s are leaving, it just feels like I’m losing what little bit of family I had gotten.” Nerys looked down at the floor. “The worst thing is that I hadn’t thought about Kirayoshi and the O’Briens in a in a long time. It was only when Julian told me Miles was leaving for Earth to teach at the Academy that I remembered those months and everything I felt during them. The war escalated after Kirayoshi was born, and I didn’t have much time to really think about what I was losing until right now.” Nerys laughed slightly. “I guess I’m just looking for something more to complain about in my life now that the war is over and Bajor is safe.” Ezri shook her head.

“What you felt… what you feel, it’s not fake. During war we’re often reduced to thoughts of how to survive. You’re only now starting to address other things and that’s okay. You loved and cared for Kirayoshi didn’t you? Don’t you still?”

“I do. I know Jadzia found it silly that I felt such an attachment to Kirayoshi but I do…” Ezri smiled, remembering through Dax how much Nerys felt affection for the small child. Recalling it now only sparked more fondness within Ezri. Nerys’ gentleness was as moving as her braveness. 

“It’s only natural Nerys.I remember whenever you saw him you swore he would smile at you,” Ezri smiled. Nerys let out an amused breath.

“I swear he did! He recognized me!” Nerys argued lightly. 

“I don’t doubt it,” Ezri said, tone filled with fondness. It was wonderful to hear Nerys’ mood improving from how she was initially when she entered Ezri’s office. She pulled Nerys in for a hug and Nerys rested her head on her shoulder as they relaxed onto the couch. They stared ahead towards the window again.

“I’ve spent my entire life dealing with much more serious things than a goodbye... Why am I so affected by this?” Ezri thought for a while.

“Maybe because you’re so used to your enemies being physical rather than emotional… I don’t know… that’s something that I can’t tell you. But I’m here for you Nerys... “ Ezri laid a hand onto Nerys’. 

“How can I stop feeling like this?”

“Lets go to the O’Brien’s going away party. Let’s say goodbye to them together.” Nerys looked down at their linked hands and her face grew determined. 

"Alright."


	2. Chapter 2

The party was intimate, only ten or so people inside the O’Brien’s home. Keiko upon seeing Nerys and Ezri let out a sigh of relief.

“I was so worried you wouldn’t come Nerys. I realized an hour ago that our message hadn’t gotten to you.” Nerys smiled at Keiko.

“It’s alright, I’m happy I could make it.” Ezri squeezed Nerys’ arm as they found their way to the edge of the room. Molly was excited to see her Aunt Nerys and Aunt Ezri and presented them both with drawings she had made for them. Ezri’s heart soared as she saw Nerys’ face light up with joy and they all hugged one another.

“Where’s Kirayoshi, Molly?” Ezri asked after the moment had passed.

“He’s napping!” Molly announced. Despite the party going on, Kirayoshi was deeply asleep for the entire party. After everyone but the two of them had left, Nerys resigned herself to the fact she wouldn’t get to say goodbye to the little boy who had changed her life.

“Thank you for allowing me to experience being a part of your family,” Nerys told the O’Briens who all embraced her in response. Ezri and Nerys had just turned to leave when they heard a cry from the other room. It seemed like Nerys would get her chance after all.

Keiko brought Kirayoshi into the room, rocking him gently to calm him. 

“Hi Yoshi!” Nerys cooed at the baby. Ezri looked on in surprise as Kirayoshi in fact smiled at Nerys. Keiko walked towards them, angling herself so that Kirayoshi could see Nerys better. 

Nerys held out her fingers towards Kirayoshi’s outstretched hand. She shook his hand gently, smiling widely as Kirayoshi’s grip tightened and he smiled at her even wider. 

“Would you like to hold him?” Keiko asked. Nerys nodded. She hugged Kirayoshi as soon as he fell into her arms. 

“Oh, he’s gotten big!” Nerys said. Kirayoshi immediately relaxed in her arms. They all continued to talk for a while, sharing stories about Kirayoshi and Molly and of the future. The conversation lasted for a long time but as soon as Nerys saw Molly yawn, she knew it was time for her and Ezri to leave. 

“Have a safe trip back to Earth,” Ezri said to the O’Briens. She placed a supportive hand on Nerys’ shoulder as she adjusted her grip on Kirayoshi to hand him over.

“May the prophets protect you and your family Kirayoshi,” Nerys murmured softly, brushing some of his hair away as she handed the child back to Keiko.

“We’ll try and visit soon,” Keiko assured. Nerys nodded.

“I’ll look forward to it.” Nerys hugged Molly and the rest of the O’Briens one last time and Ezri did too. When the doors shut behind them, Ezri was relieved to see Nerys was relaxed and content. On their way to Nerys’ quarters, they held hands in a comfortable silence. As soon as the doors shut behind them, Ezri chose to speak. 

“I’m proud of you.”

“Thank you for being there for me Ezri. I probably wouldn’t have gone if it weren’t for you. I would’ve regretted not being able to say goodbye.”

“Anytime Nerys. I know what it’s like to have regrets when it comes to family. I didn’t want you to feel like I did.”

“I love you Ezri.” 

“I love you too Nerys…”

Ezri tipped her head upward to meet Nerys’ lips. All was good.


End file.
